Ask her something like “Are you sure that you don’t want to be together anymore?” to see the status of your relationship. Social media can also give you a clue about whether she’s still interested in keeping your relationship going. If she’s deleted photos with you off her Instagram, changed her profile picture to one where she’s single, or changed her relationship status online to “single,” take this as a sign that it’s over. If she’s blocked you on social media or through text, give her space and move on. Don’t try to force communication, however hard it might be.
Don’t dismiss her concerns about your relationship by getting defensive. For example, if she says “I don’t see you enough to feel a close connection with you,” reply something like, “I get it. I hadn’t realized that this was a problem for us, and I’m really sorry. ” Instead of having this conversation over the phone or text, it might be a good idea to invite her out on a final date. Talking face-to-face can give you a chance to have a deeper conversation, and might also lead her to rethink her decision.
“I’m sorry that I’ve made you feel ignored by flaking on our plans. That was wrong of me, and I realize now how you must have felt hurt. ” “I’m sorry for the times I picked fights with you. It wasn’t right of me to take out my frustration on you, and you truly deserved better from me. ” “I’m sorry that I got lazy in our relationship. You shouldn’t have had to take on all the responsibility in keeping ours going. I understand how frustrating and hard that must be. ”
“I know I haven’t taken enough initiative in our relationship in the past. I want to change this—can I plan a weekly date for us to do something together each Friday?” “I’m sorry that I’ve struggled with anger issues that have affected you. I’m going to start taking classes in anger management next week. ” “I would never physically cheat on you, but I understand now how wrong it was of me to talk to those other girls online without being open to you about it. From now on, you can check my social media whenever you want to. ”
The 5 love languages are compliments, quality time, giving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. Showing your girlfriend that you care for her in the love language that she most appreciates is the best way to keep her feeling secure in the relationship. A post on social media can also let her know that you’re thinking about her, so long as you don’t overdo it. Try something short and sweet, like “Missing my best friend. ”
Everyone has a different idea of romance. If you’ve been dating an outdoorsy girl, try inviting her for a hike. Or, if your girlfriend’s idea of romance has more to do with candlelit dinners, spend the afternoon making her a delicious meal.
Your letter might look something like this: “I’m writing this letter to let you know how much I care for you, how much you mean to me, and how happy I am to have been able to share life with you. I’m constantly in awe of your intelligence and beauty, your kindness and patience, and the way your eyes light up when the world excites you. Witnessing those moments has been one of the deepest pleasures of my life. I love you; I want to be with you; I am always thinking about you. I know we’ve been through rocky times, and I apologize for my part in causing them. A second chance with you would mean the world to me, but I respect your decision either way. ”
If she asks you why you’ve been communicating less with her, tell her something like, “I wanted to give you some space after our last conversation. I still really care about you, and if you want to talk more, I’d be happy to. ”
You can suggest a break in the relationship if you think that this is the right choice. Say something like, “I know you’re going through a lot right now, and I want to support you. But if you think that taking a break might be for the best, I’m happy to give you that space. ” It’s possible that during the break either you or your girlfriend will decide to end the relationship completely. If that’s the case, it’s time to move on, however hard it might be.
Coming off as too desperate will push her away from you, so try your best to remember that you’re a capable person who is able to live their own life.
It’s important not to cross any boundaries after a relationship ends. If she needs space from you, give it to her. Everyone has the right to end a relationship for whatever reason they want.
