Spending time by yourself lets you focus on your own needs and desires. People who spend more time on their own experience more growth and personal development overall.
It can be scary to spend time on your own if you’re not used to it. The best thing you can do is push forward and face your fears. In time, it will get easier. On the flip side, spending the majority of your time alone isn’t healthy, either. Balance is key here—if you feel like you and your partner never spend any quality time together, it’s time for a conversation with them.
Some people also use the 80/20 rule, where 80% of their time is with their partner and 20% of it is on their own.
Start the conversation by saying something like, “Hey honey, I wanted to talk about how much time we spend together. You know I love hanging out with you, but I think I need some alone time, too. It will help me decompress and be less stressed throughout the day. ” If your partner is the one asking for alone time, try to hear them out, and don’t take it personally. It’s not that they need time away from you, specifically—they need time away from everyone.
Journaling Meditating Writing a gratitude list
Making yourself a cup of coffee or tea Going on a walk around the block Soaking in a bubble bath Reading 10 pages of a new book Listening to music
Doing embroidery Hiking Doing puzzles Roller skating
This is especially true if you’re an introvert. Introverts rest and recharge by themselves, while extroverts get energy from being around other people.
Or, get out of the house by going on a short drive or a walk around the block. An easy way to do this is to give yourself 30 minutes when you wake up and 30 minutes before you go to bed.
Don’t have a ton of time? Try taking 10 deep breaths to slow your breathing and calm your mind. Or, go outside and look at the clouds for 30 seconds.
