One approach to fixing a class you are not enjoying is trying to network with even one person from that class outside of the classroom. If you are a quiet student is there another quiet student you can befriend and connect with?
An example of a mantra: “I can make it through this hour of English. I can focus on getting my work done, so I have no homework. I will ignore the students who do not seem to like me. ”
You can even vent to your friends or family about your classmates. Having this outlet outside of class can make the time in class easier. If you are still struggling, consider seeking out a counselor or therapist that can give you a safe space to talk about your frustrations. [1] X Expert Source Chloe Carmichael, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 29 May 2019.
Taking a look at the way the classmates you are having a problem with interact with others may also tell you it’s nothing personal. Their baseline may just be negative, and this goes for everyone. Knowing that they are harsh to everyone makes it much less personal. [4] X Research source
Speaking to someone who is close enough to the situation to even witness what goes on may help in the event that you are misinterpreting something.
Even if the behavior isn’t bullying, a teacher can help. Your teachers can facilitate solutions like letting you work with groups of students you may have more in common with or assisting you in becoming a bigger part of the class.
When other students seem to treat everyone around them in a mean manner, it can be a sign these students have underlying issues they are trying to hide. They are probably not acting mean to just you, but instead trying to hide their need to fit in with a mean attitude that pushes everyone else away. They may feel like the safest approach at school is to scare everyone off so no one can hurt them. [7] X Research source If the bullies are acting out for attention, there’s a good chance that they will leave you alone if you don’t react.
Take a look at their actions to see if they are being done to make an effort to harm you or if you are just interpreting a lack of effort on their part to include you to be mean. [8] X Research source
While at times any mean behavior at school may be labeled as being “bullying,” not all behaviors actually add up to this. For example, if a classmate who is in the same grade level, about the same physical size and has no real power over you is bothering you, this probably isn’t bullying since there is equal power. The intimidation factor isn’t present. Beyond the power issue there also needs to be a valid intent to harm, so if this is a classmate who just plays jokes on you but doesn’t seem to want to harm you that isn’t bullying. A classmate pulling one practical joke also lacks the repeated pattern of bullying as well.
Getting out of the peripheral can be as simple as making an effort to participate more in class and making an attempt to talk to others and make new friends. One way to make sure you are noticed is to “get big” and commit to making yourself more of a known presence in the class. This means taking a stand in group activities instead of just blending in. [10] X Research source
Keep in mind most of the other students in your class are just like you, trying to fit in and make friends. Take a close look at your own behavior to make sure you aren’t being left out simply because they don’t know you want to join in.
Sometimes being a quiet person can send signals to those around you that you do not like them. Breaking the silence of not speaking up in class does not need to start out in a huge way. You can start out by just making an effort to make small contributions to the bigger conversation. Or, you may show interest by just laughing at the right time during an animated story being told by a classmate. [12] X Research source Examples of small additions to the conversations might include: “I heard that too, what do you think?” “No Way!” “You are not kidding! He does do that!”
If you find that even after trying to make yourself a part of the conversation, you do not have much to say about the subjects they talk about, you may just not share any common interests with the group. There may be little need to be friends with these people outside of class. [13] X Research source
