You didn’t give them enough information about yourself Someone else gave them misleading or inaccurate information about you They have misconceptions about autism (e. g. that it’s impossible for girls to be autistic)
If you’re afraid of faking it, it’s pretty safe to say that you aren’t faking it, and you genuinely believe you’re autistic. Fakers don’t worry that they’re faking. And even if you thought you were autistic but aren’t, that doesn’t make you a bad person. You’re allowed to be wrong. [2] X Research source Some autistics don’t feel sure until they get an official diagnosis, or external proof (like records of developmental delays). Some don’t even feel sure after that. Of course, that doesn’t mean that everyone who feels uncertain is definitely autistic. Take time to analyze these feelings and where they’re coming from.
Can be kind and empathetic. Aren’t always lonely or “weird. " Some autistics are very social and friendly, and some “pass” as non-autistic. Other autistics are quirky and solitary, and that’s okay too. Aren’t always bullied. Some experience little or no bullying. Can be good friends. Can be lovable and worth loving. Have talents. They may be above average in some areas. They may be average or below average in others, which is also okay. Can have happy lives and bright futures. Can make contributions to the world they live in. Are, regardless of whether they’ve been labeled “low-functioning” or high-functioning” by society, valid and human beings.
Read articles describing what autism is and what the signs are Talk to autistic people online Reflect on which signs of autism do and don’t fit you Deal with any difficult emotions related to the subject
ADHD Social anxiety Schizoid personality disorder Avoidant personality disorder Sensory Processing Disorder (which most autistic people have, but non-autistics can have too) Alexithymia Complex PTSD Schizophrenia Something else
You had hoped the label of autism would give you concrete answers about yourself, or give you a sense of closure about your situation. For example, maybe you’re having a hard time dealing with growing up. Some of the things that help autistic people also help you. You feel isolated or seek a community that can help you understand your experiences. You feel like people are pushing you too hard and not understanding you, and you hoped a diagnosis would help them be more understanding. You’re struggling with your self-image and want to change how you see yourself or others see you.
If you have unexplained problems in your life, keep searching for answers and asking for help. You may find a real answer in time. If some of the things that help autistic people also help you, then keep doing those things. You might be introverted, highly sensitive, or otherwise neurodivergent. Take care of yourself regardless of what labels do or don’t fit. Start reaching out to kind people, and distancing yourself from unkind ones. Invite good people to do things with you. Work on assertiveness skills to handle people who treat you badly. If people are pushing you too hard, work on being assertive and telling them when something is difficult for you. Ask them for what you need to make things easier. If you’re experiencing loneliness, say “I’m lonely” or “I wish we could spend more time together” to someone you love. Communicating your feelings can help. If you want to develop some new part of your personal identity, try experimenting with your personal style and hobbies. You may find something new that interests you. Spend more time with people who share your interests and show an interest in you.
Know that you didn’t hurt any autistic people by asking if you are autistic. Professionally-diagnosed autistic people tend not to be bothered by people who wonder if they’re autistic, or even self-diagnose. [3] X Research source
Try to get outside for at least 30 minutes each day. Walk around, feel the sunlight, and try some moderate exercise. Fill at least 1/3 of your plate with fruits and vegetables, if you can. Sleep for 8-10 hours each night, depending on your body’s needs. Do things that make you feel good (like hobbies or time with friends) and avoid things that are toxic to your mental health (like obsessively checking the news).
If you have an unmet need, say it. Saying “I’m lonely” or “I feel ignored lately” gives people an opportunity to be there for you.
Talk with your autistic friends. Cheer them on in good times, help them through their hard times, and let them help you when you are struggling too. Participate in positive campaigns like #REDinstead and Autism Acceptance Month. Praise and uplift underappreciated autistic people. Enjoy media, like art and stories, created by autistics.
