You may think that a relationship that lacks a lot of physical intimacy will not be as enjoyable, but the benefit of courtship is that you can really get to know a woman without the distraction or confusion of things that typically happen when dating or hooking up with someone. Courting a woman allows you to have a lot of fun with creative ideas and know her intimately through conversation and activities together, which will be a more solid foundation for marriage. [4] X Research source
Families are different, and some won’t need to know you well before their daughter is courted by you, but some families place a high value on the man’s participation in the family because they want to know they can trust you before they allow their daughter to spend a lot of time with you. If you are older and the woman has already moved out of her house and is living on her own, family participation may not be as important. However, you’ll want to check with her to make sure you aren’t overstepping any boundaries.
Not all courtships are this serious and sometimes they are similar to dating, except they are exclusive and more serious. If you aren’t ready to pursue marriage, then make sure the woman you are courting is on the same page so that there are no frustrations or confusions from either party before you begin courting.
You’ll probably want to make sure she is actually interested in you romantically before you ask her father, because it takes some courage to go to a girl’s father and explain you are interested in her daughter, and it would be a bit embarrassing if she ended up turning you down.
Some fun date ideas that you can do in public are outdoor activities like kayaking on a lake, going on a picnic in a park, going to the movies with a group of friends, visit the local tourist areas in your town, learn a new hobby or sport, or go to a local amusement park or zoo together. Pay attention to what she likes. For example, if she mentioned her favorite drink is a Cosmo, go to a restaurant and order a Cosmo. If her favorite activity is yoga, try to do a yoga class with her. Pay attention to those small details in your courtship. [7] X Expert Source Courtney QuinlanMatchmaker & Dating Coach Expert Interview. 27 August 2021. When going out with her, don’t just talk about yourself. Listen actively and show interest. [8] X Expert Source Courtney QuinlanMatchmaker & Dating Coach Expert Interview. 27 August 2021.
Romancing a woman also has to do with the way you treat her in front of others and your desire to serve her. Some women want to do everything on their own, but one of the greatest ways to show you care for someone is to serve them. Caring for the woman you are courting by doing things for her and helping her through difficult times can be one of the most meaningful ways to communicate to a woman how you feel about her.
Some courtships don’t even allow kissing, meaning the couple has decided to save their first kiss for their wedding day. Others, however, are more casual and allow physical touch throughout the relationship. Discussing this with the woman you are courting is important because you want to make sure you are on the same page. You don’t want to overstep a boundary and turn her off, but you also don’t want to make her wait around wondering when you are going to take the next step physically. [11] X Research source
This doesn’t mean become best friends with her best girl friend. Get to know her friends and be amicable towards them, but understand proper boundaries. If you made best friends with her friends and the courtship ends, it could be awkward for her and for you to try to continue to pursue those friendships.
Do you want to spend time focusing on your career? Are you interested in making a high income? Do you want to have a big family, or a family at all? Do you want to travel or settle down in one place for a while? How much time to do you hope to spend with your family?
Some important things to talk about here are the number of children you hope to have, if one of you wants to stay at home with the children while the other works, if you want your children raised in a certain religion, if you are going to be more hands-off parents or very involved. This may be a hard question to ask but make sure you talk about your view on divorce. If you feel divorce is okay but the woman you are courting does not or vice versa, this is probably a sign that you shouldn’t get married. You want to make sure the woman you marry has the same values as you so that less conflict occurs during marriage.
Even though courtship is designed with marriage in mind, not every courtship ends in marriage. If you are to the point in your relationship that you realize marriage doesn’t seem right for the two of you, you’ll need to break off the courtship. Have a gentle conversation explaining why you don’t think things would work between you two in the future and explain that you valued the opportunity to court her. Make her see that it’s not that she has all of these flaws, but that the two of you together just don’t mesh well. [15] X Research source
