Your bedroom might be a good choice if it’s a private, quiet place. If your house has a lot of other people in it, try driving somewhere private so you can cry in the car. But make sure you feel well enough while driving there and back; crying while driving can be dangerous. You can also cry in the shower - no one will hear you there. Being outside might help you free up your mind to process emotions. Look for a private spot in the park or on the beach.
There are many other types of distractions. You might stay late at work every night, spend all your time going out instead of being alone, or read articles online until you fall asleep. Think about what you tend to do when you’re not in the mood to feel emotional, and make the decision to stop and focus on your emotions.
If you’re sad, think hard about the event that brought about these feelings. Think about how much you wish it hadn’t happened, what your life was like before, and what your life will be like from now on. Let yourself understand and feel the loss of what might have been. No matter what strong emotion is causing you to want to cry, think it through and allow it to take a prominent spot in your brain. Observe how much it’s stressing you out, and what a relief it would be if the problem would just go away.
Once you really start crying, it’ll probably be hard to stop. Keep crying until you’ve let it all out - you’ll know when you’re done. The average length of a bout of crying is 6 minutes.
According to one study, 85% of women report feeling better after crying, while 73% of men do. [4] X Research source If you don’t feel good after crying, consider why. It can be hard to shake off years of being told that crying is weak, and so on. If you’re embarrassed that you cried, try to remember that it’s completely natural and healthy.
Men tend to have more trouble letting it all out than women do, primarily because men are taught to keep their emotions to themselves. But crying is just as natural for men as it is for women, even if they do it less often. Girls and boys cry the about the same amount until they reach age 12. [6] X Research source When they become adults, men cry 7 times a year on average, while women cry 47 times a year. [7] X Research source Crying is in no way a sign of weakness. It’s an expression of emotion that has nothing to do with decision making. You can still take brave actions, even if you cry in anticipation. In fact, crying could help you process the emotions you’re feeling and think more clearly about what’s ahead. Crying is not for babies, contrary to what you might have heard. Children are more likely to cry because they have not yet internalized the idea that there’s something wrong with it. But the need to cry does not go away when you grow up.
It relieves stress and lowers blood pressure. Over time intense stress and high blood pressure can lead to severe medical problems, and crying helps to mitigate these issues. It’s a way to remove toxins that build up when you’re upset. Certain chemicals build up in your system when you’re stressed, and crying helps to expel them through tears - especially emotional tears, as opposed to tears formed as a result of irritation. [9] X Research source It boosts your mood immediately afterward. This isn’t just in people’s heads - it’s a scientific fact. When you cry, your level of manganese gets lower. The buildup of manganese leads to stress and anxiety, so crying is nature’s way of easing emotional pain. [10] X Research source
Do you harbor negative thoughts about crying? If so, try to change your views and see that there’s nothing wrong with crying - it’s good for you. Do you have trouble expressing feelings in general? Allowing yourself to cry will be a good start for you. Being able to process emotions in this way will help you be more emotional in general. When you push your feelings down and keep yourself from crying, those feelings don’t go away. You may feel either angry or numb.
If you’re struggling to allow yourself to express emotion, imagine yourself as a child. Think about how you were free to be yourself then, crying when you felt sad that a fun day had to end, or when you fell off your bike and scraped your knees. The events that make you cry as an adult will be different from those that made you burst into tears as a child, but you can still try to recapture that sense of emotional freedom. It might also help to think about how you treat others when they cry. Do you tell them to stop, to hold it in? When your best friend feels overcome and starts crying, you probably give them a hug and encourage them to let it all out. Treating yourself with the same kindness, rather than self-censuring, could help you feel comfortable enough to cry.
Steel Magnolias Stella Dallas Breaking the Waves Blue Valentine Rudy The Green Mile Schindler’s List Inside Out Titanic The Boy in the Striped Pajamas My Girl Marley And Me The Book Thief Room Romeo + Juliet The Notebook The Fault in Our Stars The Giver Grave of the Fireflies Up Coco Finding Nemo Old Yeller Where the Red Fern Grows Hachi Forrest Gump
“Not the Love We Dream Of” - Gary Numan “Lost” - Gary Numan “I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry” - Hank Williams “Hurt” - Johnny Cash “Tears in Heaven” - Eric Clapton “On My Own” - Les Misérables “Jolene” - Dolly Parton “Motion Picture Soundtrack (solo piano)” - Radiohead “Say it Like You Mean It” - Matchbook Romance “I’ve Been Loving You Too Long” - Otis Redding “How Could This Happen To Me” - Simple Plan “I Know You Care” - Ellie Goulding “Goodbye My Lover” - James Blunt “Carry You Home” - James Blunt “All By Myself” - Celine Dion “My Heart Will Go On” - Celine Dion “Young and Beautiful” - Lana Del Rey “The Ice Is Getting Thinner” - Death Cab for Cutie “Too Late” - M83 “Welcome to the Black Parade” - My Chemical Romance “With Light There is Hope” - Princess One Point Five “Apologize” - One Republic “Night Owl” - Gerry Rafferty “Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space” - Spiritualized “8 Billion” - Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross “Cry Like a Rainstorm” - Linda Ronstadt “Shot” - Rochelle Jordan “The Call” - Regina Spektor “Blue Lips” - Regina Spektor “If You Could See Me Now” - The Script “Street Spirit (Fade Out)” - Radiohead “Remember Everything” - Five Finger Death Punch “Scars” - Papa Roach “Var” - Sigur Rós “The Man Who Can’t Be Moved” - The Script “Coming Down” - Five Finger Death Punch “The Scientist” - Coldplay “Wait” - M83 “Wound” - Arca “Echoes of Silence” - The Weeknd “Fourth of July” - Sufjan Stevens “One more light” - Linkin Park “Youth” - Daughter “Don’t Cry For Me Argentina” - Madonna “I’m Sorry” - John Denver “Iris” - John Rzeznik and The Goo Goo Dolls “Stay” - Blackpink “Mask” - Dream “Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story” - Original Broadway Cast of Hamilton “My Immortal” - Evanescence
You may even consider seeking help from a therapist if you find yourself needing to cry for extended periods of time. This may indicate a serious issue, such as unresolved grief or depression.
