Try to have a backup plan for dates. Carve out several pockets of time during the week in which you’re available to get together. Avoid making plans that are hard to change. Buying tickets to a play or concert, for example, is a bad idea when your partner could potentially back out. Stick to more flexible plans, like planning to get dinner at a restaurant that usually does not require reservations.
It may be a bad idea to ask a doctor, “How was your day?” Opt for another conversation starter. Ask about a TV show you both like, or discuss news about mutual friends. Do not go overboard, however. If you partner had a stressful day, he or she may need to talk about it. On occasion, allow your partner to rant about work-related stress. Strive to be understanding and a good listener.
It can be a nice gesture to have food ready when your partner is expected to come home. Order takeout and have it ready or make a home cooked meal.
Hang out with your friends. If your boyfriend or girlfriend can’t entertain you on weekend nights, make plans with friends instead. Find hobbies you enjoy. Take up a craft like knitting. Start reading books in your spare time. You can learn to enjoy alone time. You may learn more about yourself and your passions with the free time you gain by dating a doctor.
If your partner is stressed, he or she may seem a little cranky. Your partner may seem somewhat withdrawn and may be quicker to anger and somewhat moody. If you suspect your partner is experiencing stress, try not to react with anger. Calmly say something like, “Is there something bothering you? Is there any way I can help you feel better?”
Try to be understanding. Actively listen to what your partner has to say, and offer apologies for the fact he or she is feeling this way. Reassure him or her you’re there, and that you care. If there is an issue that needs solving, you can get to that later. After offering initial comfort, think about ways to problem solve. Be clear that you’re working with your partner. Explain you’re not trying to tell him of her what to do, but want to brainstorm ideas to effectively work through the issue.
Ask how you can make your partner’s days a little smoother. It may be something as simple as chipping in with some chores now and then. Understand your partner’s needs may be different from yours. He or she may handle stress in a way that’s different from how you handle stress. Remember that different is not bad. Respect your partner’s needs.
Sometimes, distraction is key. Plan for a movie night at the end of a long day, or to marathon watch a TV show you both love. Suggest you and your practice stress reducing activities like meditation and yoga together.
Your partner’s patients may become suddenly ill. In the event of a medical emergency, the patient will come first. While you may be frustrated by this at times, remind yourself this is what you signed up for by getting involved with a doctor. Try and think about the patients when you feel frustrated. While you may want to see your partner, they’re undergoing stressful medical procedures and potentially serious conditions.
Allow for some simple rituals, like watching the sunrise together each morning. Plan brief dates, like running to the store together or having a picnic. Appreciate when you spend time together. Turn off your phone and eliminate distractions. Focus solely on enjoying your partner’s company.
