The same thing can be said about impressing her once you’ve already met and started to date. There is no single set of steps that can be used on every girl who falls under the “otaku” label—including the steps listed in this article. Use the label as a starting point, but always personalize your approach based on the specific girl.
Navigate forums related to anime, manga, or other aspects of otaku culture. Join active groups on Facebook or other social media websites about those topics, as well, and participate in the discussions that go on as much as possible. When you find an interesting girl, start following her on her blog or on one or two social media websites. Don’t follow all of her accounts at once, though, since doing so may come on too strong and scare her away. [1] X Research source
For example, try going to a store that has a wide selection of anime or manga. Spend time at an arcade. See a movie that has a large female fandom or, if you’re feeling especially daring, try going to an anime convention.
Discussions about shows, movies, and related media tend to be a good place to start, especially if you see her looking at a similar series in a store. [2] X Research source If you don’t know enough about her likely interests, you could even start the conversation by confessing your lack of knowledge and asking her to make a recommendation.
The Japanese concept of “otaku” is similar to the American idea of a fangirl (or fanboy), geek, or nerd. A person could be an anime otaku or game otaku, but someone could also be something like a train otaku. Anyone who loves something enough to obsess over it can be labeled as an “otaku. ” The American concept of “otaku” tends to be someone who is obsessed with some part of Japanese pop culture or Asian pop culture in general. Anime, manga, and computer games are the most notable obsessions, but an otaku could also obsess over J-Pop music or Korean dramas.
Another advantage to your research is that you’ll learn more about the type of things she loves, rather than knowing only a few examples. Most otaku girls will branch out from their original obsessions and latch onto things related to them. [4] X Research source If you learn enough about what interests her, you may eventually be able to introduce her to something else she’d enjoy, which will definitely leave her feeling impressed with you.
Keep in mind that your gifts do not need to be expensive to make an impression. As a general rule, otaku girls tend to enjoy inexpensive merchandise related to their favorite series and characters just as well as expensive merchandise. Something as simple as a Totoro plush toy might be enough to charm a girl who loves Studio Ghibli characters. If traditional romance is your style, you can stick with it, but try putting a twist on things. Take her out for dinner and a movie, but pick an anime movie (for an anime otaku). [5] X Research source Similarly, you can buy her jewelry, but look for jewelry connected to one of her favorite franchises.
Many otaku girls even enjoy the fact that their interests are somewhat obscure. After all, an obscure interest is unique, and people generally like to feel as though they’re one-of-a-kind.
Like most women, she’ll want to be complimented on her appearance sometimes. Instead of saying something general–“You’re really pretty”—compliment something specific, like a certain feature—“I love the color of your eyes”—or a specific accessory—“Your glasses perfectly frame your gorgeous eyes. " You should also compliment her personality, as well as her appearance. Remark on her intelligence, her cheerfulness, her generosity, or any other positive feature.
For example, if she’s picky about grammar and spelling, you probably shouldn’t send her texts like, “wanna hang out??? c u l8r!!” Instead, take the time to spell things out and double-check your messages for errors.
For those girls who are extroverted, also keep in mind that certain settings may still make her uncomfortable. She might like socializing with close groups of friends, but that doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll enjoy going to a packed club full of strangers.
When she’s out enjoying the things she loves, take time to enjoy your own interests. Visit friends, have some alone time, or go to an event you know your otaku girlfriend would never enjoy. If you feel the need to be constantly connected to her, ask yourself why. You might be feeling neglected or jealous. Figure out what the issue is and talk it over with her before it gnaws away at the foundation of your relationship.
When you do spend time doing what she loves, try to be genuinely interested in it. If she wants you to watch a favorite movie, pay attention to it instead of staring at your phone. If she drags you along to a convention, try to find something about the convention that you can be interested in, as well. You can also let her instruct you on her hobbies. For instance, if she happens to love a certain game, let her teach you the best way to play it
When you show that you trust her, it may also make it easier for her to trust you. By demonstrating that you are dedicated and secure in your relationship, you’ll show that she has no reason to doubt your affections.
Dropping your guard should be done in moderation, though. You don’t need to show up at her door in polo shirt and khakis, but on the other hand, you don’t want to wear the same stained t-shirt four days in a row, either. Be casual, but take care of your appearance and exhibit respectful behavior.
