Try to be polite to a drama queen, especially if you work with them. However, do not invite small talk. You can say “Good morning” to a drama queen, but do not follow up with, “How is your day going?” In some situations, it may feel rude not to ask a drama queen how they’re feeling. For example, if they ask you first you may feel obligated to ask in return. In this case, try to minimize your interactions. Do not let a drama queen talk too much before excusing yourself, saying something like, “I’m sorry, but I’m late to a meeting. "

Drama queens tend to use hyperbolic language, blowing small matters out of proportion. A drama queen may, for example, say things like, “My boss hates me, so I’m getting fired. " They may also lash out at you when feeling dramatic, saying things like, “You never listen to me anyway. " These things are usually a drama queen’s way of blaming problems on outside drama rather than their own choices. For example, saying their boss hates them is probably an exaggeration. They probably made a poor choice at work and, while they were reprimanded, they will not be fired. Accusing you of not caring or listening is a way to distract themselves from a negative situation by starting fights with friends, family members, and co-workers. Always try to decipher what a drama queen is really saying, and keep in mind the situation is not as dire as they make it seem.

For example, you ask a drama queen why a co-worker was late for work and the drama queen launches into a story about how stressful the co-worker’s absence was for them. They may also make accusations about the co-worker’s behavior, and say things like, “I would never be allowed to show up that late. " Stop this kind of talk in it’s tracks. Say something like, “Can you just stick to the facts? I really just need to know why Sophie was late, please. "

For example, a co-worker comes into work clearly in a bad mood. You know this person is a drama queen. They’re deliberately trying to get people to ask them what’s wrong, sighing loudly and commenting about their bad day. The drama queen is seeking attention, and will likely drag anyone who bites into a spiral of drama. Instead of responding, focus on your own work. If necessary, say something like, “Sorry you’re feeling bad, but I’ve got work to do. "

It can be helpful to write down a list of behaviors that bother you. What does this person do that causes you stress? Maybe they text you constantly when they’re stressed about something. Maybe they exaggerate money problems when they’re upset, even though they know you’re genuinely struggling. Rank how much these behaviors bother you on a scale of one to 10 stress wise, one being the lowest and 10 being the highest. The behaviors on the higher end of the scale are behaviors you should no longer tolerate.

Do not beat around the bush. Simply tell the person how you’re feeling and what limits you’re setting. For example, say, “Can I talk to you about how you communicate with me when you’re stressed?” From there, clearly state what your boundary is. Say something like, “You cannot complain to me about money anymore. Your stories about your financial situation and inconsistent, and as a result I end up getting stressed about something that isn’t really a problem. You know I’m paying off medical bills right now, and so money is a touchy subject. "

For example, say something like, “Hey, sorry, but we talked about this. I can’t help you with money problems right now. "

Say something like, “I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m having an issue with a co-worker. I just need your help enforcing some boundaries. " From there, calmly explain the issue and let your boss or manager know what they can do. For example, you may want to work different shifts from this person in the future.

Think about what you get out of a relationship with a dramatic person. Do you feel better about yourself when compared to a drama queen? Do you get bored easily and crave the thrill of drama? Think about other ways you could fill the needs a drama queen fills. For example, if you feel bored with life, try taking up a new hobby or joining a club.

For example, if you work with a drama queen, try to have lunch with a pleasant co-worker to compensate.