This might sound discouraging, but the sooner you accept him for who he is, the better. You may even feel more at peace once you stop holding onto the hope that he’ll change.

You can do this with big things, like where you want to live, or even small things, like where you want to go to dinner. The more you put your own needs first, the better you’ll feel.

It can be really hard to stay calm and not react when someone is saying mean things about you (especially when it’s your partner). If you need to, walk into the other room and take some time for yourself before talking to him again.

“If you belittle me in public again, I’m leaving this relationship. ” “I’m not going to talk to you if you keep calling me names. Let’s revisit this conversation once you’ve calmed down. ”

“I understand why you feel upset. I’d probably feel the same way. ” “I totally get why you’re angry. That would make me mad, too. ”

If you ever feel like you’re remembering something wrong, try writing it down. That way, you have concrete evidence of what happened that you can look back on. Or, repeat a mantra to yourself, like, “My version of reality is right. No one else can tell me what happened to me. ”

“These flowers are beautiful! Thank you so much for thinking of me while you were out and about. ” “I really appreciate you giving me so much grace when I messed up earlier. I can tell that wasn’t easy. ”

You don’t have to use your friends and family to vent about your boyfriend if you don’t want to. Even hanging out with them as a distracting activity can be a nice way to take your mind off things.

Practicing self care looks different for everyone, so don’t be afraid to try a few things until you find what’s right for you.

“Hey honey? I know we’ve talked about a therapist before, but I really think talking to someone might be helpful for you. I care about you a lot, and I just want you to be happy. ” “I think talking to a professional could be good for you. They might be able to help you work through your emotions and understand where you’re coming from. ”

A professional can help you find strategies and coping mechanisms to deal with your boyfriend’s behavior.

Leaving a narcissist isn’t always easy. Make sure you have a plan in place to keep yourself safe. If you’re in an abusive relationship and you need help, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233.