A manager who is not supportive of staff and works to undermine staff, or who even steals the glory for work completed well by others. A manager who is deceitful and either lies about performance of workers, or fails to praise or point out when work is done well. A manager who threatens excessive or inappropriate outcomes for work not completed on time, or in a certain manner. A manager who doesn’t take responsibility for errors but uses workers as scapegoats and blames staff when things go wrong. [2] X Research source Harvey A Hornstein, Brutal Bosses and Their Prey, pp. 110, (1996), ISBN1-57322-020-5 A manager who practices favoritism in the work place, setting some workers above others for no apparent reason. A manager who publicly humiliates, condescends, demeans, verbally attacks, or name calls staff. A manager who hasn’t got the slightest interest in your personal life, and goes so far as to not support you when you have family crises or other personal issues that need attending to during work time. A manager who acts superior all the time, believing their own abilities far above anyone else’s, and expects everyone to snap to attention, or else.
Insulting staff members in a very personal manner, often publicly. Invading your personal space without asking Threatening you verbally or non-verbally Sending email flames Interrupting you rudely during meetings Giving you dirty looks Acting as if you are invisible when it suits them Withholding praise even though you clearly deserve some Second-guessing all the time or demands perfection Making sarcastic jokes or teasing you as a means to deliver a nasty message Reminding you in front of everyone where you stand in the hierarchy Touching you when it’s clear that you don’t want this Making two-faced attacks – you understand one thing from your boss, only to learn later that your boss said something opposite to somebody else Stealing clients or accounts from other workers Bad mouthing the firm’s culture Refusing to help or explain anything when asked (but will deny this if pressed by anyone else, and insist it was you who didn’t ask for help), etc. !
Robert Sutton explains the trick is not to expect your annoying boss to change (that’s unlikely to occur) but to expect the worst from your boss while expecting that you will remain fine once the ordeal is over. [5] X Research source
Be one hundred percent across your job description and be able to respond as to how whatever you are doing fits within those parameters. It may sound silly but there are plenty of employees who don’t understand fully what their role is, and can become a target of a bullying manager as a result. If you do extend yourself beyond your job description, be prepared with sound reasons for why you did this, how it has not interfered with your usual duties, and how it benefits your boss. Earn respect by showing confidence in your work. Be organized and manage your time efficiently. Do not create any opportunities for your annoying manager to call you out for breaking company policy or rules. Adhere strictly to break and lunch times, avoid leaving before your hours are up, and be on duty a few minutes earlier rather than being a few minutes late. Meet your deadlines, or keep people properly informed where deadlines are blowing out. Do not give an annoying boss any reason to find fault with your work or with you as a worker.
Seek small wins instead of looking for the knock-out punch. While the larger problem of your annoying boss isn’t going to go away, a series of small wins can boost your confidence, build up a more solid workplace positioning for you, and encourage others to do the same as you, which could ultimately undermine your boss’s approach and wrest back more control for you and your colleagues. [6] X Research source
Avoid meetings with your annoying boss where possible, or keep them short (look for a room without chairs). [7] X Research source A fair amount of mystery is great for keeping you under the radar, and makes for interesting contemplation on the part of your manager. Don’t give in to becoming one of the boss’ “favorites”. Not only can this so-called favored position change at a mere whim, but not being in this position also means that when top management gets wind of how poorly this manager is doing, you won’t be tarred with having been compliant with this manager’s behavior or favoritism.
Learn to think on your feet. Many annoying managers have poor interpersonal skills, which is why we find them annoying. These types are bound to throw questions at you, at the most inappropriate of moments, catching you off-guard or when they know you will falter and stutter. This reflects a power play, a person who is insecure. Always remember this at the back of your mind, as this will help you to cope effectively, knowing the true reason behind the aggressive behavior. Excuse yourself politely when any confrontation becomes unbearable. If you are losing control during a confronting interaction or you experience difficulties explaining yourself and being understood, make an excuse, and walk away. Go to the bathroom, have a cigarette, throw M&Ms around in the car park, etc. , but do not stay in the situation and get yourself dragged in further.
Don’t perceive yourself as a victim. Don’t respond in kind; instead, see yourself as remaining calm, detach yourself emotionally from the annoying manager, and don’t try to control what is out of your control. Focus instead on what you can control and on helping others who matter to cope too. [8] X Research source Realize that staying calm can infuriate a person unable to control their own angry emotions. Don’t let their lack of self-control unnerve you – just observe it for what it is. Find allies. Find those you can trust and share strategies for coping. Try daily affirmations or meditation to help you to remain calm. Take deep breaths and count to 10 before replying to a jibe or other annoying attack from your manager. Think of the chefs on Hell’s Kitchen who respond “Yes Chef!” and nothing more! (You find out later what they are feeling and thinking!)
Just be careful that this is a safety zone, and there isn’t a possibility of your annoying manager walking in. If so, look further afield, such as a cafe, a neighboring park, etc. For example, nurses can hide away in nurse’s lounge away from doctors, or techies in a common room where bosses never are known to go. Balance the advice on not gossiping with constructive discussions about your boss’ poor behavior. It is possible to talk about the facts rather than belittling a person with rumors. Get the mixture accurate and you’ll be supported by your coworkers.
