A bully may try to make it seem like the name he or she is calling you is some sort of nickname and it is harmless. It is not harmless if it hurts your feeling. No one has the right to give you hurtful nicknames or dehumanize you. For example, a bully says “Hey, big head, you’re walking too slow!” You can respond by exercising assertiveness and say “My name is Carlton. I’d appreciate it if you called me by my name. “[3] X Research source Do not allow the bully to dismiss your request. You have the right to ask him or her to only call you by the name you go by. That is not unreasonable or overreactive on your part. You are not being too sensitive to not want to be called names.
Even if you can’t completely stay away from this person, walking in a group or sitting near the front in your classes may deter bullying behavior. Avoidance can work for cyberbullying, too. If a person is calling you names online, it is smart to document any behavior by printing the evidence or taking a screenshot. Then, block the bully from all your profiles so that you no longer have to make contact with the person. [4] X Trustworthy Source StopBullying. gov Website run by the U. S. Department of Health and Human Services providing information related to identifying and preventing bullying Go to source
For example if the bully is calling you four eyes, brush it off since all he or she is really saying is that you happen to wear glasses. It is a fact you wear them and really nothing to be bothered by. Shrug it off and walk away. Doing this immediately takes the power away from the bully.
Count to 10 slowly in your head. Breathe deeply—in through your nose and out through your mouth. Repeat to yourself “I am the picture of calm” over and over again. Imagine something funny happening to the bully, like a giant container of slime being poured over his or her head. Try not to laugh, just think this in your head to fend off getting mad.
Telling just one adult should be enough. If it doesn’t seem to change things, tell someone else until you get the help you need. You can simply describe the behavior: “Jodie has been calling me rude names during practice. It’s embarrassing. "
Bullies tend to target people who are by themselves. [9] X Expert Source Katie StyzekProfessional School Counselor Expert Interview. 28 October 2020.
Remember no matter how silly a name is, if it is hurting the person being called that name it is not OK and not a joke. Ignoring name-calling can lead the abused into depression and in some cases even to making a suicide attempt.
Children who are bullied and feel hopeless may make attempts to handle the situation on their own that have dire consequences like suicide. Ignoring any name-calling you witness could make the victim feel alone in the bullying and result in serious consequences. Something as simple as “Hey, why don’t you leave him/her alone?” should do the job. It calls attention to the misconduct and tells the bully this person has support.
Reinforce that each child has the right to feel safe and respected. Model this behavior by not only encouraging the kids to talk about bullying but also by taking action to resolve the issue. You can say “If you’re being picked on at school, it’s important for you to tell someone. You won’t get in trouble for telling. In fact, telling someone is really brave. "
For example, you might tell a reasonably well-liked child to team up with a child who is being bullied for an activity. When others see this person interacting with the victim, they may be more likely to befriend him or her, too.
You can encourage the child to join in activities they excel in to give them plenty of chances for positive feedback. Recognize their strengths in front of peers and show them they have a lot to be proud of.
Many people assume there really isn’t any harm of being bullied unless it gets physical and this simply is not true. It can be just as hurtful if not more so to be bullied by emotional abuse. Any threat needs to be taken seriously, it is not up to you to decide if the bully will carry out the threat. If he or she says harm will come to you take that as a threat and get help.
Being weak isn’t always about size or strength either—it can be something as simple as finding a classmate that is often alone. A bully usually does not want a lot of witnesses so just making sure you have friends around throughout the day can drive away a bully. A bully may also pick on someone they see as an easy target if there is a low blow they can make fun of. Instead of reacting with sadness or anger towards the insults, you can either ignore the put down or if it is made as a joke laugh along. The bully will probably leave you alone if you aren’t allowing him or her to make you the punchline.
A bully taking things to a hurtful level may be the only way he or she knows how to get attention for the abuse he or she is suffering from. Being aware of possible abuse is important if adults are considering involving the parents of the bully in the solution as this can be dangerous for the bully. All parties involved deserve to be safe and secure in their environment, this includes any child that is being called names and the bully as well. Giving the bully a safe place to express emotions is just as important as being open to talk to the victims.
Bullies act out to gain power over someone who they see as being weak, often because they lack the self-esteem or personal power to be secure on their own. You just happen to be a victim that was available and perhaps initially gave the bully the reaction he or she was searching for.
