For instance, if a friend or coworker makes a racist joke, you can say something like: “Why do you need to make fun of someone else for the sake of laughs?” If someone starts promoting the “All Lives Matter” counter-movement, you can point out how it hurts and minimizes the struggles of black people. There’s also nothing wrong with directly asking someone what they meant by a certain comment. [2] X Research source Don’t be afraid to pick your battles, too. It may not be worth getting into it with a random, hateful stranger, but it’s definitely worth talking to a loved one, friend, or co-worker. [3] X Expert Source Nancy Lin, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 27 May 2021. It’s also okay if you can’t think of something to say in the moment! It’s perfectly natural to be at a loss for words in that type of situation. [4] X Expert Source Nancy Lin, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 27 May 2021.
For instance, you can say something like this: “Billy sits in the cubicle next to me, and he made a racist joke directed at me during our lunch break. Could someone speak to him about this privately, or is there diversity training that the company could look into?”
These negative, self-doubting feelings are known as the “Imposter Phenomenon,” which is experienced by a lot of people in minority groups. [7] X Research source
You can also consult a spiritual leader for guidance if you’re having difficulty with the effects of racism in your everyday life. They may be able to offer some insight or resources that can help.
For instance, you can create a group text with a few friends, or reach out to your friends individually. Friends and allies can be a great source of comfort and healing in the aftermath of hurtful, uncomfortable situations. [10] X Expert Source Nancy Lin, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 27 May 2021.
If you maintain a positive attitude about your identity, you may feel much better equipped when it comes to dealing with racism.
There are also some ways you can get help for free.
Racism occurs at different levels in society. For instance, there’s “individual racism,” or racist actions and attitudes that happen on a person-to-person basis. There’s also “institutional racism” and “structural racism,” which are perpetuated through organizations and governments, respectively.
Racial microaggressions are subtle types of racism that show up in conversation, or in a person’s everyday behavior. A lot of the time, people don’t realize they’re partaking in RMAs. Micro-assaults, micro-invalidations, and micro-insults are all forms of RMAs. A micro-invalidation takes away from other people’s struggles. Saying something like “That sounds tough, but I also have it rough” is a good example of this. A micro-assault is more targeted language, like a racist joke. Micro-insults are more subtle jabs, like asking a person of color how they qualified for a certain job.
For instance, if someone is spewing insults and threatening violence, it might be best to let them walk away before you approach the victim.
For instance, you can say something like: “I understand where you’re coming from, but saying that all lives matter really invalidates the struggles that the black community is going through right now. ” You can also say something like: “I get that the COVID-19 outbreak is scary, but there’s no reason to target or blame individuals from the Asian American community. ”[16] X Research source
For example, instead of saying: “Your point of view is racist and unfair,” try saying something like: “I understand where you’re coming from, but I don’t think you’re considering all the facts. ”
For instance, if someone is causing a disturbance by insulting and belittling someone, you can report them to the police for unruly behavior. You can give the footage to the police and see if they take action on grounds of disorderly conduct. If a hate crime was committed, law enforcement will definitely be able to take action.
If you choose to address a racist remark online, you can say something like: “I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but that kind of attitude is really harmful towards minority groups. ” There’s absolutely nothing wrong with unfriending, unfollowing, or blocking someone on social media for the sake of your mental health.
Reporting is always the best course of action, but you can also reply to hateful comments if you feel up to it. You can say something like: “What gives you the right to say something so cruel and hurtful?”
If you have any friends that come from a minority background, ask them if they’d be willing to correct you if and when you say something incorrectly.
