Nemeses are like the opposite version of you. You’ll find nemeses at work, at school, and in other situations where you’re paired with like-minded similar people. Everything tells you that you should be friends with your nemesis—you’ve got similar interests, goals, and hobbies—but you just don’t get along. Your nemesis is the oil to your water. Frenemies are friends that you don’t like. Well don’t ever be friends with your enemy, not even frenemies. But when you’re hanging out, she doesn’t ever stop bragging. Frenemies are irritating, toxic, and a real downer. Enemies are tough. From the classroom to the workplace, enemies are serious threats to your ability to get through the day. An enemy is someone who thinks you’re taking their popularity, so they hate you and always win at everything.
Many bullies, frenemies, and other kinds of enemies operate from a place of jealousy. Often, enemies will pick on things that they have anxiety about in their own life. If you’re being picked on about one thing, it might be because your enemy has anxiety about the same thing or they just want to be mean and embarrass you. Enemies also hate people they view as threats. In the workplace or at competitive schools—any time competition is involved—enemies will seek to eliminate you from winning. That means you’re in a bad position.
Hubris. Just like in the ancient Greek stories, excessive pride can lead to the downfall of many enemies. If you’ve got a braggy, boastful enemy, being put in a position of embarrassment will be devastating for this enemy. Good revenge might mean setting your enemy up for some public embarrassment or failure. Confidence. Many bullies are really just big babies who have no self-confidence or belief in their own abilities. Lots of bullies are really just looking for companionship and friends, because they feel undervalued and unloved. These types of bullies might respond better to a kinder tactic. Competitiveness. Many enemies are hyper-competitive jerks who’ve allowed their love of winning to overcome other considerations, like human decency and kindness. Learning to disengage and freeze these enemies out is the best way of handling them and disarming their ability to torment you. If you don’t play, they can’t win.
If telling a bully to stop doesn’t get them out of your face, continue repeating the phrase. If they fail to get a rise out of you, most bullies won’t be entertained enough to keep on with it. After failing enough times to provoke you, most bullies might just leave you alone. [5] X Research source If a bully escalates things after you tell them to stop, it’s not inappropriate to tell someone, a teacher, parent, or a superior in the office. Get someone else on your side.
If you’ve got to see your enemy on a regular basis, like at work or school, and you’re forced to interact with them, your job will be tougher, but not impossible. The best way to avoid these enemies is to avoid listening to them. Put in earbuds when your enemy’s spouting off in the school, so you won’t have to listen to it, or show up right before the bell rings in class and sit on the opposite side of the classroom. It’ll be like they’re not even there.
Practice picturing your enemy doing something ridiculous, like singing opera or wrestling with an octopus, when they’re confronting you. Don’t listen to the toxic spew coming from your enemy’s mouth. Practice reciting a mantra any time they speak, focusing hard on replacing the words you hear with something positive. Your favorite song lyrics, a poem, or a prayer might be an appropriate little passage to memorize for these occasions.
When your enemy comes around, literally act as if nothing were happening. No sound, no other person present. Give them absolutely no reaction whatsoever. Even if your enemy is standing two feet away from you shouting your name, just ignore them and talk to a friend as if nothing were happening.
Bullies will most often pick on individuals who they think is a threat at beating them. If you’ve got a cadre of good buds to hang out with, though, you can deflect a single bully easily by turning the numbers back on them.
Hacking into your enemy’s email to send compromising list-serv messages that will embarrass your enemy. Order something embarrassing to have delivered to your enemy at the office. A big box full of old Pro Wrestling magazines, or adult diaper catalogs, or strange and exotic pornography to the workplace. Make sure to have it deliver to the building, not to your office suite, so the delivery person will have to wander around to all the offices and find your tormentor personally. Go crude. Poop in a paper bag on your enemy’s doorstep? Jolly Ranchers in the shower faucet? An upper-decker in the toilet tank? You be the judge of how far is too far.
Make a fist by wrapping your fingers into your hand firmly, but not so tight you cut off the circulation. Wrap your thumb around the bottom of your knuckles, not around your index finger and not inside your fingers. Extend the middle knuckle of your middle finger slightly. This is where your fist should make contact, not your big knuckle, where your fingers connect to your hands. Punch in a straight line, keeping your elbows in and throwing linear punches, not big circular haymakers. There’s a lot more power in a straight jab than in a big swing. Aim for the nose, the neck, or the stomach. Punching someone in the jaw, cheek, or forehead will end up hurting you more. Aim for soft spots and swing hard.
Hold your fists, loosely formed, up near your face and shift your weight so your shoulder and hip on your dominant side are pointed at your opponent. Don’t square up to your opponent, but turn to one side, to make a smaller target. Keep your hands up near your chin and the side of your head at all times, when you’re not swinging.
While it may seem unbelievable and will go against your natural instinct, it’s much safer and less painful to move into punches instead of backing away from them. Keep moving forward and getting your enemy to retreat, rather than stepping back. If you have to take a hit, meeting it halfway, before it’s reached its full power, will hurt less than at the apex of the swing, where you’re more likely to get knocked down. Move forward and get your enemy to shift back.
If you knock your opponent down, back off. Say, “This is over,” and walk away. You’ll have proven your point.
Again, fights should always be the last resort to dealing with your enemy, and should be avoided at all costs.
